Tuesday, November 11, 2003

They ARE on Drugs

More than once I have asked myself if the Bushies are on drugs. It all began when they said that an Arab Muslim nation would want to be controlled by infidels. They certainly got that wrong.

They they tell me that Saddam and Osama are practically the same guy. They they denied saying it. Then they tell me that Iraqis will greet us with open arms. Then they deny saying it. They they said Saddam had WMDs. Then they denied that too. I began to wonder if they were on drugs or if they thought the rest of us were.

Well the mystery is solved. Colin Powell has opened up like an addict at an NA meeting. In an interview with a Saudi newspaper he admits to taking the sleep aide Ambien, which can be addictive. In the name of journalistic integrity I have to point out that several years ago I took Ambien. My doctor told me about the drug's habit forming potential when he prescribed it but would not give me a refill. I resolved whatever was bugging me at the time and got my z's without the help of any more pills, but back to Powell. I wonder if his doctor is as cautious as mine.

Powell does say he only uses them if he is changing time zones. That doesn't explain why he lied at the United Nations back in February. There is no time zone change between Washington and New York. So unfortunately he is claiming to have been clean and sober when he gave that speech that will live in infamy (October 15th posts).

Powell also said that "everyone" uses Ambien. Who is everyone? Is it Bush, Cheney, Rumsfeld, Rice or all of the above? Frankly I hope they are all on drugs. It makes everything more logical and explains that pretzel incident too.

Jessica Lynch Topless

It seems that Jessica Lynch was incredibly friendly with her fellow soldiers. So friendly in fact that she felt comfortable being topless and posing for photos while in that state. Who else but Larry Flynt would have the pics.

I really am tired of ordinary people being turned into heroes because they accidentally find themselves in trouble. Enough already. By the way, this story first popped up several months ago in British newspapers. I wonder if it was mentioned in the televised biopic the other night? I wonder if it was mentioned in the current Time cover story? I haven't checked but my guess is that it doesn't come up at all.